Revived

 

 

She used to love going to church early

Cleaning the chairs,

Sweeping the floors and doing the decors

Not a Sunday went by without her lovely presence

Having graced the small building where fellowship took place

She went from cleaning to protocol

Making sure all went well in church.

First timers and new converts were carefully attended to

Everyone present felt comfortable

And nothing bypassed her watchful eyes

She so loved working for her saviour

It gave her joy and happiness and peace

In His presence was the only place she felt at home

After all, that was how it should be

But then she snapped

Being taken away from her comfort zone

Away from the only place she felt she could serve

Tore something out of her.

Of course she still went to church

But this time, was in a hurry to leave

She stopped cleaning chairs and sweeping floors

She just sat there and watched others do that

She watched others enjoy the blessings

Yet was not moved to partake in her previous joy

Sure she loved the services and the song ministrations

But there was something missing

She knew because it was the first time she felt that way

Then she figured it out

Kingdom stewardship

That was supposed to feel her with joy yeah?

But no, it did not

Rather, it made things worse than ever

There was no pull to engage

She tried, she started

But there was still something missing

She could not figure it out.

She spent day after day listening to her saviour’s inspired songs

Hour after hour

Still nothing

The thought of giving up crossed her mind

But her spirit would not let her

She would not suffer eternal damnation

It was not her destiny

But then she could not go to church anymore

She began to feel unworthy in His presence

Guilt and depression flooded her soul

She would feel so empty

No one to talk to about it all

No one perfectly understood her except Him

Yet, His voice could she hear no more

So, she tried to do it by her own might

Sadly forgetting that it is not and will never be

By her own might or power

But by His Spirit, which she still had but did not feel anymore

So she dived into spiritual books

Finding understanding but not quite knowing how to engage

Then one day

One Sunday morning, like the ones she had now

She did not go to church

But had a somewhat strange inspiration

To read a book in the Holy book

A book she had always intentionally skipped

For reasons only known to her

She did read

And read

And read

And then she found it

Revelations 2:4-5

It was like her saviour was talking to her

And so she listened,

And understood

Happiness flooded her soul

She prayed and finally knew

The last piece that was missing

And vowed to put it into work

To make sure she will never loose her connection

Her connection to her saviour again

For to her, it was a terrible thing

And she promises to remember her first love

And from where she fell

And to do her first works

So that that first bond that was broken by her carelessness

Would hopefully be restored

And she can have her eternal peace, joy and happiness.

Penned, MhizAma…

 

 

 

Independence Day 

​It’s a  few days before sixth of March and i’m nervous

Pretty colors of red, yellow, and green scheduled to fly up in the sky

such a pretty light show for Kofi amd Kwame

But I don’t think we meant that red stain on purpose

It’s just a few days  before  we celebrate our independence

Our freedom


I ask again are we free, or are we just dumb enough to go along with this charade

You know FREEDOM is more than a song off Beyonce’s Lemonade

Hold up 

It’s only a few days  beforethat lovely day in March

But I saw on Facebook a young girl committed suicide 

her grades were bad , and the rumours continue

while her wealthy parents sit at home

She never got the chance to say goodbye

Goddamn, It’s almost sixth March
They said, they said Ghana the land of the free and the land of opportunity

but why our little boys and girls don’t get the opportunity to become explore their talents, and our little girls are still being defiled, kids are still be trafficked and put under strenous work ? The rate of unemployment still keeps shooting high

Or is this institutionalized genocide

I thought Ghana was a nation I could believe in, but God, I think the systems ate  killin us on purpose, our leaders are hurting us for their own selfish benefits,

But now

Its a few days to  March 6th

The sun is coming up

And i’m tired, i’ve been reading too many hashtags
And we tired, we’ve been reading too many hashtags and opinions and justifications and social media activists and the media updates and conspiracy theorists and…

I mean 

Are YOU tired?

Cause my heart is heavy and for the first time in my … short years

I feel more yesterdays than tomorrows in my future and I matter. And I’m ready. I’m ready for my Independence day.
Blurryface pens… 

Dreams For Diet 

Lit across my heart are dreams

Dreams that I have clutched to a decade

Turned me into a walking fantasy

I fear I may never hit reality

Mirages line my lids

Outstretched arms, I zombie through

Through this once upon a times I was born


Dipping my teeth deep into thick flesh of wishes but I’m still numb

I bath optimizm yet

Veiled in pessimism I carry my gory state to my tomorrows

Ashing to ashes my dreams

And dust to dust my believes

My night cease not to lift a gaze to the moon 

Hoping desperately it’s beauty will reflect joyland across my soul

Sprinkle pixie dust to lift me out of my weary

Clutch to my chest are yet 

my dreams still

Hardened desert heart will never steal

Not from me

Not from my forever

For I’ll always sleep;thus

Will my dreams be 

 they will never cease.

My dreams are my diet

So I take them every night.

Penned_afeafa✍🏾

Him & Her

​Chapter 5:

Him: Chariann finally brings food. Isn’t everyone just… hungry? I stare straight at Him. We fortunately sit opposite each other at the dining table. Chariann by my side and Violet by his. I see the way he straws at her and treats her like his property. It sickens me. A princess is what she is. Why doesn’t he see that. I bet he feels he’s the best she can ever have. Dumb. Trying not to strangle the already dead chicken on the plate I grab a fork, and a knife. That’s when Chariann proposes a toast to love. To love.

Her: I hear the sarcasm in his voice, and I just want to run away from this whole table thing. Excuse me, can I use the wash room. I need to run away. I need to think. She asked Shay to show me to the wash room.

Him: Immediately Chariann said I show her to the washroom Mr. Classy gave me a don’t try anything funny look. Awww inspiration. I put one arm on her back and motioned in the direction of the washroom with the other. Then I whispered in her ear. One more kiss.

Her: I swear my legs almost failed me but it didn’t, damn I’m freaking strong. I want my lips to touch his again but that won’t give me time to think. So we got to the washroom and I’m hoping he doesn’t kiss me because I want to think. And more so because I can’t resist. Shay please don’t…

Him: Sarcasm?? That’s sarcasm right? You sure you don’t want me to? I wouldn’t if that’s what you really want. Oh sorceress.

Her: It’s getting dangerous and I don’t like it. I really want to leave can I make an excuse, see you somewhere else. I can’t stand being around him when I see you right in front of me. There is so much I want to say and do. This was a bad idea. And I’m sorry he just came around he is overprotective. I’m scared. I’m just so jealous of how well you play this role. I can’t play this role. You two seem to be in love and I just want to go back living my life. I put my hand on my face. I was stupid to think this was going to be a whole new life for me. How hopes can be shattered. After today don’t look for me. Don’t think of me. I doubt you would. But I’d not forget that I found hope with you. I need to go away. He looked at me, like he is waiting for me to pour it all out. The way he was close and his mouth almost apart I could tell he wanted to say something or probably kiss me.

Him: Okay. 

Her: That’s all he could say? I guess I never thought it would hurt this bad. He says okay but he is holding me and he is so close. Okay? Say something more. Please do.

Him: I’ll tell Chariann you have a personal emergency.  I tried not to say more. What will I be promising her if I can’t even be there for her as much as I would have wanted to. She’s not mine after all. Its pointless wishing. So I’ll let her go. I guess I was stupid too to feel this way. So I left her standing there and whispered to Chariann the message I had for her. She didn’t take it to mean anything as I tried to keep up my expression. I’m the good liar after all. The one who doesn’t seem to be affected by any of this,. The one who plays the role so well. Regardless of what I was beginning to feel. I must let go. So I sat and poured myself some more wine waiting for her to return to the table.

Her: Why am I crying? I clean my eyes and let out a breath and walked out. I’m sorry I took so long. I have to go. Thanks for the dinner. I manage to smile at Chariann. Let’s go Chris. He gets up and we both walk towards the door. Shay walks behind us. Chris smiles at Shay and asked him to come over for dinner too, before Shay could speak Chariann agreed smiling widely. I look at Shay.  See you then cousin. I don’t know but that hope came back again.

Him: Bye.

Love Me 

Selfish doesn’t even come close

How is it that I poured it my all and can’t get same in return?

I, hold my heart and I said I love you

Love me

Love me not for my beauty cos it will break my heart if your love fades with it

My heart’s already broken cos you’ve not loved me…

All you see is the smiles I give

What about the ones I want to keep?

What about the silent tears my pillow comfort?

I have craved for so long all I have left are my cravings

So deep have they gone,I have been rendered paralyzed to love even to look

All I do is stare

I’ll plung my whole heart into a resemblance of it

Love me..the cliché that not for who I am and not,that…that glitters is not gold

My heart is cold

I wish I could ride the fantasy

my heart so longs the strive but the shambles is all it can think of

My heart beholds the dream and yet all it can feel is palpable fear

Fear of being broken

But if you love.. Kiss my doubts away and I won’t nag

Raise me high like a trophy and I’ll look down bestow a smile that rubs even my eyes

I’m lost always… Shred apart from the ones I love

But love me into reality

oblivion has engulfed beyond rescuing….but love me!

penned_afeafa✍🏾

Him & Her

Chapter 4 :img-thing

Shayden

 Again I will meet her and lose all my composure. She’s just one of those factors that aren’t factored in I guess. One of those disaster you never prepare for. You break and mend and still can’t fix. She makes me comfortable with my broken state. That state that nobody else seems to understand. Damn sorceress. Always messing with my head. I was walking to meet her again. Who knows what she brings with her. I know it’ll make me smile but I hope dinner isn’t ruined. She’s one to reveal surprises.

Her: Why am I wearing a purple dress? I can’t wait to see him. I don’t think I look half pretty as Chariann, I recall her name. I see him coming from afar. Even with the distance I could see his face well. Maybe it’s just that I have the face imprinted in my memory. I take a deep breath as I see his board smile, beautiful set of teeth.

Him: My steps are suddenly all calculated. The order something I am all so aware of. Focus shifting and mind drifting. The power of Sorceress, angel in purple. I spot the purple figure in the distance and wonder how I would ever get rid of her. A siren in my head. A thought unforgettable. My world is spinning subtly. So I try to grab hold and take control of it with words when I finally reach her. Standing  just inches from her my nose almost touching hers and her eyes digging into my soul. I finally speak. Hello.

Her: Hello,  I smile. Is this a good idea?

Him: I really don’t care. Your presence is worth the risk and danger. If you’re taking them with me that is. Are you?

Her:  I nod. Am I going to this? He is another woman’s man. But heaven knows my answer. A wise man once said “the heart wants what the heart wants”, I don’t even know the wise man. All I know is that there is something about Shay that makes me keep coming back, and I might never be able to stay away.  Yes I’m going in with you.

Him: I fight to resist the urge to hold her there and then. But I am not too strong so I go for her hands and motion for her to give them to me and follow me.

Her: Shay, …you look good. How did you meet her? I don’t know if it’s the right question but it just slipped out not that I planned to ask.

Him: School. We met at school. It was alive, but how would she feel knowing the truth. She wouldn’t even believe in me anymore. I don’t want that.

Her: School, love, and study. What attracted you to her?. Wrong questions.

Him: She was attracted to me.

Her: You must have been like this all of your life.

Him: No. But long enough.

Her: I really don’t know what to say I’m getting a little nervous. But for some reason, I trust Mr Strange. I look up at him and he is looking down at me. Why are you staring like that?

Him: Is there anything prettier to stare at?. Forgive me but you inspire a lot of danger in me.

Her: I blush, maybe not. And you are dangerous indeed.

Him: Yes

Violet

We were right in front of his door. He looked at me as if to ask me if I’m ready for this. It was now that I noticed how scared to death I was. I don’t know if I’m ready for this but with Shay I seem to be ready for anything and everything. I breathe very deep, very heavy, what is this that I’m doing? I don’t know but I don’t want to back out it’s like, it’s my air. Like I almost need it. He is smiling, I see the euphoria in his smile. He looks at me and notices that I’m scared. He smiles and gives me a long assuring kiss on my forehead before he presses the bell  and opens the door.

Him: Chariann. Sweetie. I hate playing this part every time. The perfect boyfriend. But it was something I was already getting used to. Something I had begun to become no matter how uncomfortable it made me feel in my own skin. She smiled and welcomed Violet and kissed me on lips. I felt guilty kissing her in front of Violet but it was pretty damn hard to notice. I motioned for Violet to enter before me then followed. I braced my self. This should be fun.

Her: Chariann, she’s looking so good. I don’t know why Shay wants me. She says hi and then offers me a seat in their mini hall, their, I hate the sound of that in my head so I shake off the spark of jealousy trying to show it’s head. She asks Shay to sit with me and that she isn’t done in the kitchen. Thanks, nice place though. I sat on one of the sofas facing the television in the hall. And Shay is sitting beside me.

Him: I hope you’re hungry. You’re going to love what Chariann is cooking. I could feel her face boil at the obvious tease. Relax. Should I get you something??. Juice, water…wine?? I said with a subtle smirk plastered on my face. I intentionally reach across her breasts to the table beside her chair and she nearly screams with surprise. I pull back my hand holding the remote and stand up to get her what she wants still waiting for a reply. I chuckle a bit though. Couldn’t help my self.

Her: I’m sure my face is having a lot of expressions right now. But I manage to keep smiling. Water. And don’t try anything funny Mr. Strange; we are in your place. I raised my eyebrows. He smiles and leaves placing the remote down back the same way he took it, I look at his face and he smirked, this man is dangerous.

Him: Actually her place. Does that mean I can try something funny? Never mind. It’s best we leave that to fate Sorceress. And I think we’re out of water, and juice. I add the all so popular evil grin which is a bit silly of me, but heck, what’s that to her, she seems to see me in the same light as I see her. I eye the remote almost as if to say we have more future work to do. She stifles a giggle as she picks it up and places it on her lap. Oh it’s on Sorceress. I enter the kitchen to see HER busy at work. Mmm, smells yummy. Where’s the wine?. She points to the fridge and chuckles almost as if to say “did you really just ask that?” I grab three glasses and pour one for her and take the remaining to the hall. Hurry sweetie. I enter the hall to find the last thing I expect. Uhm sweetie I think you should cook for me more!! I yell back into the kitchen. Violet turns to me with an oh no face. The guy at the door seemed to have followed her here I guess. And that must be Him. Okay I’m confused. The classy looking guy probably drove a Lamborghini here. Hello. I’m the cousin. I said setting the glasses and the bottle down and racing for the door. Oh Sorceress. This just became really interesting I thought as I turned and smirked at her. 

Her: F*** , he just doesn’t listen. Like a shadow he is everywhere I go. He looks at me and smiles and I had to smile too. I was excited that today I wasn’t going to play the girlfriend who is so much in love with her boyfriend. He is so impolite how could he just come in here uninvited but that’s what he does. Too full of himself he feels like he owns me. What the heck, I’m freaking nervous right now. But I give myself a prep talk. It’s okay just play your part. I look at Shay apologetically. He looks at me and smile. Shay shows him to the seat I was in and he sat by me. He smiled at me and I smiled at him too. Shay seems not to like it when Chris puts his hand around my neck and draws me closer to HIM. I wish I could just get lost, I want to be alone with Shay. I breath in and look at Shay who seems to be getting mad, I wish I could hold him and tell him that I only want him. You made it. I thought you won’t come at all. He just smiled and nodded.

Him: We need more wine.

 

Being Single On Valentine’s Day Is Actually The Best , Here’s Why …

February 14th has come  along, if you don’t have a significant other, you usually feel the compulsion  to find a partner, because nothing’s worse than spending Valentine’s Day alone, right?WRONG. As awesome as it is to have an SO on the most romantic day of the year to do all the exceptionally romantic things couples do, there are definitely many, many advantages to being single too, Yes ! I said it.

  • For one your wallet won’t take a hit .You know that if you were in a relationship with someone you really cared about, the money you’d end up spending on a romantic dinner and gift would totally be worth it (despite your aching bank account).main-qimg-6b0b199b7cfdf2214b7daa3ec8bd17a2-c
  • You don’t have to stress about planning some massively romantic gesture for bae. The truth is, trying to plan an elaborate date that blows all your other dates out of the water is really hard — not to mention, intimidating. How do you even know for sure they’ll like what you’ve planned? And why is it so expensive?
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  • You can do WHATEVER you want to do. When you’re single, February 14th is just another day of the year. You don’t have any obligation to go to some fancy-schmancy restaurant while trying extra hard to be romantic. You can just spend the day doing what you love to do: personally watching movies. Charlie that series where dem catch ?
  • sure-whatever-you-want_o_185380
  • You can watch whatever movie YOU want. You won’t have to go through the hassle of seeing if bae likes the movie you want to watch and, if not, what it is they’d rather watch instead. The back and forth of picking a movie is totally eliminated and you can just cuddle under your favorite blanket and watch The Fault in our stars (eiii so i couldn’t watch it with that girl hmmm) like you’ve been planning on doing all day without having to worry about anybody else.49810620
  • And you’ll have more free time. Let’s be honest: Valentine’s Day isn’t a one day commitment. With all the extra effort you have to put into getting the perfect gift and planning the perfect love-dovey night out with bae, you can end up spending weeks planning for the big day. But if you don’t have a bae, you can spend all that time doing something else, like writing the next bestselling teens romance lol… or your version of fifty shades novel!
  • funny-picture-too-much-free-time
  • You can meet someone new ON Valentine’s Day. Love is in the air! What better time to start a brand new romance with the guy standing in front of you at Starbucks, or the cute cashier at your fave bookstore? Valentine’s Day is the perfect  excuse to be extra bold and ask them for their number, or to chat up your crush at a party. Not knowing what amazingness the day will bring is just as exciting as any romantic date.
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Him & Her 

Chapter 3: 

Him: she always looks pretty . Perfect in everything she is. Always so perfect. How do I deserve her. Safe and loving and always there. Somehow that always made me feel distant. I’m not all that. I’m reckless and wild within I guess. Just so much pouring inside that needs to come out and she wouldn’t understand what unrest is within me and how I don’t feel I deserve her. Maybe I do, maybe I don’t. But Violet… she’s an escape from all that. Holy**** VIOLET . Uhm Chariann. Give me a second.

 

Her: I see him coming and I want to hide. He’s like fresh breath but what’s going on I can’t breath. He is looking straight at me so I hurry to pick a bottle of milk and talk to the older lady standing there but he is still coming towards me. Does this taste good, have never taken them before.
Him: They taste like you. Your lips I mean… sorry uhm I’m here with my girlfriend and you are my cousin. This should be fun right?. Come along now. I grab her by the arm and realize she isn’t resisting much. You’re addictive sorceress. I told myself if I ever see you again then what I was afraid off was true. This is a magically destined union of souls. Now come say hi to your rival.

Her: My rival, the sound of that freaks me out but I know this means I’m going to have to see him often and heaven knows my hearts greatest desire is that alone. His hands when they hold me, I can hardly resist whatever happens next. I’m a cousin, remember. Hi. I can hardly breath, I wait for him to do the introduction.

Him: Chari.. Violet. A pretty girl never rustled Chariann. She was beautiful and confident and well violet wasn’t really competition material to Chariann I guess. So she smiled and took her hand in a short polite handshake. Violet a little nervous but she could pass for a beautiful goofy cousin. With her awkward attempt to keep her cool. Oh Sorceress, why these complications. I wish we met on the titanic. Would have been a better love story to tell. I would be the one to survive and tell it though of course.

Her: My hands were shaky but I managed a smile. OMG she’s an angel her smile got me feeling scared. I have a freaking hot rival and I couldn’t resist to do this. Oh Shay why me, she’s your perfect match. Nice meeting you. I pray she doesn’t ask questions I don’t know the right thing to say because trust me I’m not a good lair. I look at his face and there is a witty smile and an excitement in his eyes, he is enjoying this. He puts his hand around my shoulder and asked me how aunt was and now this is me being a pretty lair. Not that I’m pretty though. She’s good.

Him: This is definitely a bad idea, but when have I ever had good ones. I do care about Chariann but violet is just something else I guess. Honey I invited Violet to come over for dinner. You okay with that?  Of course she is. Chariann always wants to meet my family considering that I am not too close to most of them. So she agrees that Violet comes over for dinner.  So this evening V. Would be waiting.

Her:  He didn’t just do that, what in heavens name was he thinking. I had to see Chris today but it seems like I’d have to make an excuse. Spending extra time with Shay could make me do anything. Sure, wait time is it going to be. So I could be ready. Turning to Shay.  Since you hardly do family would you please give your address.  And I smiled

Him: No need, I’ll call and meet you up when it’s time. We’re done here right sweetie? Chari smiled and nodded and I hugged Violet to leave. Like freezing time. I felt it exponentially. So much crossing my mind in such a short time frame. Oh sorceress. I couldn’t resist the urge so I planted one short kiss on her cheek. Take care Violet. 

Her:  I almost froze. His lips so cold on my cheek. I couldn’t help but smile. I better leave before I hold him and kiss him. Alright will see you then, nice meeting you…  I forgot her name so I looked at Shay for help.

Him: Chariann.

The Algea

girl-window-rainy-day-wallpaper-1920x1080I saw him in the rain last night

Hair plastered to his skin

Lips quivering and blue

Skin as pale as a ghost’s can be

He shivered, taking a step towards me

Oh sweet love O’ mine

A modern-day Medusa

With the key to my heart

My heart turned stone cold when he touched me

But I love him still

 

I saw him in the rain last night

He spoke

I refused to hear

His voice

Like music to my ears

A melody as beautiful as the Hungarian Suicide Song

He knew very well

How to play my heart-strings

To that beautiful symphony

But I love him still

 

I saw him in the rain last night

He touched my lips

His cold wet fingers

Tracing my lips and sending shivers down my spine

I whimpered

Craving his touch more than ever

He gave up

But I love him still

 

I saw him in the rain last night

Only hypothetically

Held captive by the beautiful goddess Gaea

Gone like the wind

Looks like Kronos and Hades

They did a number on you

My heart aches

Seeking him

Sweet love O’ mine

BUT I LOVE HIM STILL!!!

By: Lowkey_Psycho

 

 

My Demons

I let the water down my face 

I stare the blank at everything

My hands clutch to the walls as I pull against the chains

Rusted but they are all that have kept me from breaking loose

Plunged into my mind is the torture

Torment of what is right and wrong

Make for the right and wrong pulls a semblance to the right

They are all right 

what seems to be the matter?

The still small voice

I tilt my head back as the desire to destroy sips through my very vains

My demons

They claw at my very soul

A scoop of gasp for air is all I can utter..

I breathe it constantly for that was all I could offer

Silent screams I render

Shakened frame, my soul falls empty to the dust

Beating up thick reflection of my desert

I’m running… But looks like I’m not running..

My soul a sand papered nature

My heart tiny droplets of sores

So i let the life pass me by 

After all I have the life

They plung the covers of my lid

Flying them instantly open into the dark

I see my demons…. always making a return…

Penned_afeafa✍🏾